Held together with Zip ties.

I am currently propped in my bed with Wonder Woman playing on the TV. My right leg is sore, painful to the bone but slowly getting there. Would you like to know how I got here? Are you okay with slightly gory post operative pictures? Yes? Read on! No? Close the window and find something else to read!
Last Tuesday I was up before the household, quick shower and final pieces packed and off I went, early enough to catch a night bus to the station. Travelled on the tube with the retail workers and work boots and tool boxes. My mohawk sans produce tucked up in a turban and a totally comfy but weird slogan for the day hoodie and I arrived early to UCLH. (University London College Hospital)

In totally British fashion there was a queue at the door as the department did not open till right on the dot of 7am. Peed in a cup and was told I was the first on the list. Which was a surprise but good. Went thought the standard medical questions and the nurse went off to get my gown and assorted gubbins. She returned with the news there was no bed for me at the moment and I would have to wait. No idea how long that would be and that generally these things resolved themselves. I hoped so, having to rearrange all the arrangements we had made would be a pain. The Anaesthetist arrived and was very pleased that I would rather a spinal over a general anaesthetic.

I sat around for a while, and Mr Gin joined me after dropping Squeaky off at childcare. I met Mr Hutt’s Fellow (possibly Registrar) and we signed forms and again I was told they generally sorted the bed issues out. While we waited in the waiting room Mr Hutt dropped in to say everything was ready to go ahead, all the bits assembled. He thought there was a bed but the surgery wouldn’t happen till the afternoon.

I was taken up around 11:30, dressed in the hospital’s finest gowns. I walked to theatre, this something if found interesting, normally there is a wheel chair or bed involved. I left Mr Gin behind, he wouldn’t be there when I got out as he had to pick up Squeaky.

The spinal went smoothly, both Anaesthetist , Mr John Dick and Chris (missed the last name) were lovely, apparently I sat very still but to be honest I didn’t feel it at all. Good work. Mr Hutt was relived that I had selected to be sedated, personally I didn’t want to be awake, nerves would make me extra chatty.

The operation was a bone graft, a piece of donor bone was to be attached to my femur with wires. The medicine/science is that the donor bone should grow into my bone and make it thicker, hopefully this will take the pressure that I can feel and spread the load. Thus hopefully lessening the pain from the stem tip that is resting against the inside of my femur.

I woke in recovery, a bit fuzzy and sore. Lovely staff, as always, recovery nursing staff tend to be the most attentive, I am assuming that recovery is a place that you have to be on your toes. I call Mr Gin, because they realised there would be no one to meet me and I really wanted to let him know I was okay. I had a lovely chat with a Filipino nurse, we talked about being a long way from home and the British weather. Then I was very proactive and threw up my nice short bread biscuit in a vomit bowl. I was feeling a bit dissociative which was to be expected but this nausea was not something I have had with a spinal. I was given a drug to help and then a swift and slightly painful bed change because my bladder was not really there so to speak and throwing up set it off. My blood pressure was low as was my heart rate, this was little bit weird, it is not a rare side effect of a spinal but the heart rate was causing concern. I needed to drink more water. Another nurse came in, a fellow who obviously spent a lot of time in the gym. We had a conversation about my gym experience as a 40 tiny woman compared to his as a hefty nurse. He felt my lower heart rate may result in being fit. (I am not sure if he was being nice, it is odd being called fit by a medical professional.)

I was taken up to the tenth floor where I was looked after by an amazing Irish nursing assistant called Kathleen, she found my home so I could call Squeaky which made me cry. She decided that a slightly nauseous, weepy, Australian mum needed that phone quickly and located it for me. She also took away the sausages and mash that landed on my table that really didn’t help and found a sandwich. Small things that helped. I rewarded her by throwing up the sandwich but in bowls, sadly still required another bed change. Another anti – nausea drug and pain killers followed. My temperature was low, not sure why, the nurses covered me up in blankets and tried to get me warmed. I was surprisingly in a single room, I was warned I would be moved onto a bay, which was fine, but I was happy to be a in a single room for the first night, feeling as spaced as I was.

A friend, H, who worked locally came over after work and sat with me for a bit. We looked at the amazing view over London but I have very little memory of the conversation because the combination of three anti-nausea meds, painkillers and wearing off sedatives really made life interesting. My blankets began undulate on their on accord, looking like that they were breathing. It wasn’t a pleasant experience but I think H thought it slightly amusing!

She left and I dozed for a bit. The downside to low blood pressure is that nursing staff want you to drink water, that in turn means that you need to pee and then that means bed pans! Ack, and getting onto those bastards is hard with a very stiff and painful leg! I hate, loathe bed pans. End of subject.
In the morning, the Surgical Fellow I met before the surgery arrived, looked at the scar, which is lower than my replacement scar, and felt that as long as the physio team agreed and I got an x-ray and that looked good I could go home that day. That was a little bit of surprise, we were expecting a bit longer and if we could get out in the early afternoon it would be all fine. My temperature was higher but blood pressure a touch low.

The Physio arrived, a lively lady named Stacey, arrived with crutches. I had morphine before she arrived in anticipation of this being tough but I was so ready to walk to the toilet it wasn’t funny. We went through a refresher of crutch using and I gently stood up. I then swore, a lot, it fucking hurt but manageable. Mr Hutt had told me that it was likely to be more painful than replacement, he wasn’t wrong. So, up I got, I was going to pee. I turned and my ears began to ring, my head felt tight and I felt really hot. I realised that I was going to faint. I told Stacey that I had to sit down, rapidly and she told me to lie down. She then harassed the bed to get my head lower than my feet. She was quite concerned and checked my blood pressure, which was low, not very low but a bit of concern and my colour was extremely pale. More goth than goth.  The Physio decided that I wasn’t going to be discharged the day with low enough blood pressure.  It took a while for my colour to return.

Stacey decided she would come back in the after lunch to see how I was going and do walking and stairs then. Annoyingly I was to stay in bed until she came back and that meant bed pans.

Mr Gin visited with snacks and I perfected some origami as we waited for the x-ray and physio. The Pharmacist dropped by and discussed drugs, including one that I had not tried before.
Dihydrocodeine, first test to see if it made me throw up and if it works.  During the day I ended up doubling it up with morphine as the pain was pretty full on. In an attempt to feel more human I changed into a nightie of my own which helped.

Stacey the Physio returned and I was fine with the crutches, although the leg was sore, I was happy to give it a go. We did not do the stairs as there was no wheelchair but I wasn’t going home anyway because the x-ray had not happened. But I did not have to use a bed pan so I did not care!
So, Mr Gin went off to pick up Squeaky and H dropped in before she went off a meeting. I was nice to have her company, we admired the view again and I wandered around a bit on my crutches. She headed off on to her meeting and I settled in for the night after saying good night to Squeaky. By 9:30 I was struggling to remain awake so I went to sleep.

The morning was an early start with the Physio turning up before the joy of the pain med cart. I walked on my crutches to the stairs, the leg was very sore but I was going to do this, I miss Squeaky and my bed. (I missed Mr Gin too, but I was seeing him.) There was two Physios and we went up and down a flight of stairs. Oh boy, it hurt, my leg is so stiff, the femur hurt a lot and the incision was tight. I did it though. I got back to my room and Stacey was a gem and located a some morphine, I was very pleased to see it. It takes a fair bit to put me in tears but there was I lying on the bed sobbing but after a while it settled.

Stacey was happy to discharge me, now it was only an x-ray and we were golden but considering they had ordered it yesterday, I was a little worried. I had a pain free nap and an entertaining time doing origami feeling floaty.

The x-ray happened and I got to see the hardware, I have five metal zip ties attaching someone else’s bone to my femur. No wonder it hurt! The x-ray technician thought I was brave, which not what I would call it.  There was a dressing change and the unveiling of the incision, it joins my replacement scar which means it that is one very long scar! The nurse said it was very neat.

The time was slipping away and Mr Gin had to go and pick up Squeaky. Thankfully the lovely R was pleased to duck out of work and wait with me while I butted my head against the wall of hospital policy about not prescribing oramorph. I was not happy with the pain management of the codeine, ibuprofen and paracetamol combo. It removed some of the pain but I wasn’t overly comfortable. The doctors suggested that I stay another night but I wanted to come home and hug Squeaky.
In the end I left with R and we had a bit of a tough time getting a cab due to being officially discharged at 5 pm. Getting discharged from hospital is unbelievably complicated and time consuming.

Home was lovely, Squeaky was lovely and it was good to see Mr Gin and eat real food. All in all it was a very different experience to Epsom and I felt it was odd that I only saw Mr Hutt once.

Half way there.

Written a week ago...

I'm currently on a London bus with Squeaky and Mr Gin. 

We are off to the Royal London Hospital for the cast change. The end is nigh for our purple cast. It is good it is going. Squeaky is growing fast and it is obviously getting too small. His belly button was hidden when he first went in it. Now it clear of the top of the cast.

It has been a journey. It took two weeks for all of us to settle into a routine with the cast. It was not dissimilar to the first few weeks after he was born, sleepless nights and tears all round.

The shining light through those days was the check up after the operation. Ms Bijlsma was very pleased. So pleased, she waited at the door of her office to tell us it looked good. The x-ray shows the ball in a good position. The socket looks a bit shallow, so there is a possibility of a brace after. Only at night though.

The cast has been a learning experience at a very quick rate. It took a lot of nappies to sort out the right size. The swelling created issues to begin with. We also had a number of leaks. The general advice it to use a hair dryer to dry the cast. That was okay except Squeaky is terrified of noise, hysterical crying and shaking.

This has meant we have had to make do with flannels to soak most of the wee. This lead to smells and a two pronged attack of tea tree oil and a popular fabric deodorising spray. It still smells. So glad to see it go.

Later in the day:

The cast has been changed. Squeaky did well, he has very little reaction to a general anesthetic besides wanting cuddles and sleep. He is such a resilient kid, it makes me so proud. He was much better once he had some snacks.

Annoyingly the opening for his nappy was right over his bits which meant a trip to see the lovely plaster technician, Derek. He made the hole bigger but it is still awkward. Also the cast is white. Meh.

We were finished by lunch and as we had all been awake since 5 am breakfast was long ago so we headed to the restaurant. Squeaky and I shared lunch with him perched on my knee as we ate shepherd's pie. High chairs out just don't work.

We headed home, Squeaky with his pristine cast and Mr Gin and I relieved we are on the downward stretch of this journey.

Six months, really, yes really!

The Big Six month update.

It has been quiet on the blog because there is not all that much to report. Not much has changed but I have had the six months check up with Mr Hutt so an update feels to be in order. It is not an overly cheerful update because I am still frustrated but will try for an upbeat mode.

So, sports massage, brilliant idea, has sorted out my back. Fabulous! I have found a good masseur through work, she is close and reasonably priced. My rock hard calves have settled down which is brilliant. I suspect this is no longer a luxury but a necessary to help my body along as I try to sort this walk. Loosening muscles seems to help a fair bit and maybe it will help with the thigh pain I have having.

Thigh pain. A frustrating new thing along with a knee that is a bit sore and audible in its crunching! The thigh pain is from tip of the implant in my thigh bone, it is deep and ranges from nothing, a bit achy to quite sore. I rarely take pain killers for it but it is not something I want to live with. Mr Hutt has explained some of the issue comes from me being a dainty wee thing, well, short (153cm) and the stem being reasonably long. It tends to get sore when I put pressure on it from exercises etc. It is deep, under muscle pain. It was intermittent when I first got the hip done then disappeared and then came back in June and has not disappeared. Yet. There is hope as it all beds in that the pain will disappear and things will be peachy. The pain is such that I am bit wary of trying to run, even for a bus because I think that will be a nasty sharp pain. Mr Hutt, thinks in 12 month we will know if it is going to be an ongoing issue.

Sadly, if it does not go in that time, the only option maybe a revision and new hip. I want to avoid that. So much. So much. So at the moment lots research happening and exercising to gentle persuade the tip to bed in and the bone to become less sensitive! I just hope it is all worth it.

The knee could be muscles pulling on the knee cap which I will get my masseur to look at that and if that does not help, off to the GP! Frankly dodgy left knee is in the bad books because I would like the body to give me a break for a while.

Needless to say all the above it a bit tough to deal with and digest but recently finding someone with similar issues with the same implant and put in by the same surgeon has helped a lot.

Exercise. I hate the gym. But I am doing static biking, leg weight machine things and cross trainer. Not too much swimming lately but I am doing a fair amount of that, not quite cracked the 1 km in 30 minutes mark but hoping to soon. At some point there will be leg presses and rowing soon, if I can work out how to use the rowing machine!

The bloody walk. I have new sneakers but they are being rapidly destroyed by my twisty left foot. I am still hip hiking and a little bit of the waddle, a throw back from the old walk and also a bit with the thigh pain. Mr Hutt felt that perfection will not happen on its own and there are some terrible habits of a lifetime break. The skeletal foundation is the best we can hope for, we think the hip has settled about 1mm down which is not much but could have been the angle of the x-ray or a result of normal settling or a major collision I had with the floor 3 months ago. He is very pleased (as am I) with the movement I have. I can sit cross legged like a primary school child, this is something I have NEVER been able to do even as a child. The range of movement is very good and smooth. The muscles are building nicely but could do with some more building.  So, this means some more gym work and locating a physiotherapist to help with the walking. There is more in this than weak muscles, there are old habits and I do not really know what a proper walk feels like.  I think this is clincher, the past physio expected I would know what a normal walk would feel like. I really don’t I have never walked like a normal person, my gait has been awkward since I learned to walk on a dislocated hip as a two year old!

I am walking fair distances and with speed, I can keep up with Mr Gin pretty well and now there is no longer any forward planning for going out, I walk my local high street easily and climb two to three stories of stairs, although a bit puffy, quite well. My overall fitness and weight leave a bit to be desired but that is the story of my life and not really to do with the new hip. I could do with losing a good 30 kilograms and that might help with the overall fitness. Sadly, I find gym boring and rather like food and booze, so this is always going to be a struggle.  I have been walking more because of all things, Pokemon Go, it drives Mr Gin bonkers but gets me out and about. I am trying to catch buses that require more walking and generally not take the lazy way out. I have to try and cut down on the red wine.

Work is a stressful which makes cutting the wine down hard. We have a trip to Australia booked, I am sure that I will set some sensors off! I have also got it my mind this new hip is going to do some driving, a lot of it. I am looking forward to a holiday.

There is not much else to report besides a little six month celebration but that will get its own post!

South West London Elective Orthopaedic Centre

I’m home and have been so for about 24 hours or so, and I’ve had time to digest my experience at the South West London Elective Orthopaedic Centre (SWLEOC).

They are a Centre of Excellence, within the NHS (National Health Service) and the majority of procedures are knee and hip replacements. There are a number of these centres dotted across the UK and different one specialise in different things.

A number different hospitals feed into the centre, including St Georges and Kings.  It is outside of London but still within the M25. For us it was over two hours on public transport. And almost on the opposite side of London.  The surgeons there are the top of their field and the nursing staff, physiotherapists and other staff are specially trained in the care of joint replacement patients.

The dedication and expertise of all the staff was very apparent, and the regime was intense. The nursing staff worked 13 hour shifts. There was a consultant on duty 24 hours, something that is quite rare. There was physio and radiography seven days a week, on the weekend a smaller staffing of the physio and x-ray.  The ratio is very good and the wards had no more than 3 beds in them, and it appeared that they tried to place people having surgery on similar days together.  The expert nursing staff meant you were in safe hands all the time and they even had prescribing nurses if drugs needed changing or new things needed treating. The goal of coming out independent was very obvious, with all staff being encouraging and gently pushing you to strive but, if you look like a rabbit in headlights they were comforting. The respect and care for the patients was just amazing.

The facilities are world class, five dedicated theatres, a dedicated radiography suite, a day ward and two longer stay wards. It is a separate centre, attached to the Epsom General hospital but very separate. The reason for the separation is to limit patient contact with infection. Infection is the bane of joint replacements. A bad infection can result in a dreaded revision. The SWELEC has some of the lowest infection rates for joint replacements in the word and they do about 5000 procedures a year. Just amazing.

They also will collect you and take you home, hour and half drive home was done by Bill. Which was gratefully received, I could not have done it on public transport.

Even though there was a lot of older patients there were some younger ones and even though it was commented I was young, I could just say I was born with congenital dislocated hips, there were questions of procedures and outcomes that were intelligent and well versed. This led me to believe, I was not that far off the norm. Once the explanation of my age was there, they procedure with me as the same as the oldies.
So, fabulous surgeon world class facility and a top of the line individually selected hip replacement. Pre-planned and measured. Sent home with crutches, exercises and a lot of drugs.  The cost of this procedure?

A large dent in my sick leave.

Nothing, in terms of money. A rough estimate would be about £10,000 maybe more.

I am beyond thankful I was in the UK and the NHS is available to all, including this immigrant. I certainly have not paid £10,000 into the NHS with my contributions.  Thank you for the amazing NHS, a huge organisation that runs 24 hours, seven days week, and I will be campaigning to stop it being privatised because without it, I would have been crippled, in debt or both.  Social healthcare for the win.

Time flies when working hard

So, I am sitting here, planning to be heading home tomorrow. They wanted to discharge me today, but frankly I was still feeling wobbly and I had not attempted stairs and the stairs at home give me the heebies.
Saturday was similar to Friday but a much better night’s sleep but still feeling pain in my knee. Breakfast but the lovely nurse Susan said I was to shower as I had my catheter out the night before. Oh, my lord, it was bliss even though I needed all the help and it was exhausting. I felt knackered but so much cleaner than the day before. I found I have lovely biro (ballpoint pen) marks from the planning on my leg and the bruises are turning the most amazing colours.
Then came physio. I was moved off the zimmer frame of doom and onto crutches. A lot of one foot catching up with the other and trying to adjust my gait to take in the new leg length and general appalling walk from years of favouriting the right hip. There were standing exercises, one that I do beautifully because of all that sock yoga.
The crutches needed practice which I duly did. We did have a bit of excitement with M, one of my ward mates passing out, and causing a great flurry of people coming from all corners of the ward. It was frightening and I was quite concerned that M was going to die, she looked so bad.
Things settled down and I tried to practice my bed exercises and talk to Mr Gin and M did it again, this time I noticed her starting to roll her eyes back in her head and alerted the nurse. Again battle stations were called and she ended up in bed, resting. By the afternoon she was looking much better and brightened when her visitors arrived later in the afternoon.
Mum, Mr Gin and I played dominoes and discussed the revelation I might be discharged tomorrow (Sunday), I expressed my concern with the lack of stair preparation and given the massively steep stairs at home Mr Gin was inclined to agree with me.
He had been a trooper coming out to visit me when his back was sore and enduring the 5 hours of public transport to see me for a few hours. It was lovely to see him, I miss his company terribly and he rocks as a partner!
He helped make sure my bed was flat which was causing the pain in my knee, which meant I was looking forward to a good night’s sleep. Buoyed by being able to get changed myself from day clothes into jammies!
Alas, that was not to happen as the other lady with a hip replacement, E began to throw up and be in enormous amounts of pain. Infection had set in and she was not comfortable. A nurse sat with her most of the night as they juggled drugs, bought the night time consultant to check her, and waited for the antibiotics to kick in. She slept sitting up some of the night and in the morning, this morning looked much better. But neither I nor M got great sleep.
Today was the dreaded stairs day, I really was nervous and not keen. The lovely physio, Karina, was caring and gentle and not that fussed about my tears. We went through steps and then hit the stairs. That was hard work and I really did not feel confident with them. She agreed that I could stay and give them a red hot go tomorrow. We also went through the height of the bed at home and the toilet and practised getting up, down, on and off those heights.
I also had a shower, stood in the shower and managed to give myself and even better wash. AND get my own trousers on, which was great. I still cannot believe I can put my full weight onto my new hip, I can stand unaided but should not do that too often.
I have also started working normally with the crutches, not one foot catching up to the other. Mum came for a visit and we coloured together and chatted as Mr Gin stayed home and rested his back.
As long as nothing happens during the night and stairs go well, I am set for heading home tomorrow. Monday, after a complete hip replacement surgery on Thursday. Amazing.

And it is done!

There has been some eventful few days, a little recap of Thursday and Friday.

We were all up at 5:30 am and out of the house at 6:45 am to be lead along a meticulously planned journey by Mr Gin. My mother and I sort of sailed along in his wake and we embarked on the 2 hour public transport trek to Epsom.

We got there in plenty of time and played in the star trek chairs before Mr Gin and I headed up to the Pre surgery unit. There we had to answer all the questions and then meet the anaesthetist, the registrar and finally Mr Jonathan Hutt, the man of the moment.  The anaesthetist, Mr Singh was lovely, very through and then explained that they generally do an epidural instead of a General Anaesthetic.  This was a bit of a new one for me, it is not something I have done before and was feeling a little apprehensive about, I had no experience of them and frankly major surgery is not something I want to listen to. In the end he convinced me and I opted for it with heavy sedation.

There was an x-ray of the CAD program that Mr Hutt had used to plan the drawing. When Jenny the registrar came in to mark my leg, I added the smiley face to add good luck to the surgery.  Mr Hutt explained what he was going to do and that we were looking at two to three hours of surgery and possibly a blood transfusion.  The words complex and difficult were bandied about but Mr Hutt was confident and everyone I spoke to, nurses and other staff said he was very good.  When speaking with medical staff I have learnt they don’t give high praise unless it is deserved, they are more likely to say just good or okay if they are not that impressive.

I was wheeled into surgery after saying good bye to Mr Gin. In the theatre there was an array of cloth covered trolleys and a bed for me. On my side and bent into an uncomfortable position I exposed my spine (and bum) and once in position sedated. And that is it.

I woke in recovery feeling pretty good in the grand scheme of things, not the normal heavy nasty feeling after a general. The leg felt pretty good too. Very numb as they inject the area with local anaesthetic and touching your own leg and not feeling it is very strange. Mr Hutt and Jenny checked in on me. He was pleased with the outcome and there was one minor hiccup . I have a piece of wire around the femur because a crack developed. My femur is not as big as he expected.  He was very pleased with the outcome and felt it should last me 20 years!  That is great news.

The other big surprise was that he did manage to take the screws out in one piece! And I have them, my companions for thirty years and they will continue, I think the form of earrings! (Need to get my ears pierced first.)

Once I had something to eat I was taken down (or up) to the ward. I was still feeling fine, very unusual, legs a bit tingly and the dead wood feel of the local still happening. I had chosen to have a catheter for avoiding the dreaded bed pan. This is also a weird experience and one I am not sure I want to repeat again.
My Mum and Mr Gin met me on the ward, a three bed with two older ladies, E, 80 having a hip done and M, 72 having her knee done. I was given morphine and unsurprisingly that made me a little spaced and chatty. All in all I felt okay, not completely comfortable but not as uncomfortable as I thought. My leg was a remarkable red colour from the disinfectant. The wound site is covered in a water proof bandage and stuck together with glue! The bruises are amazing and continue to be so, high lighting the old scars running through them.

They left and I was exhausted and ready to settle for the night. The lights were bright and I could not get comfortable. My right knee became more and more sore. Once the lights finally did go out I desperately tried to go to sleep but just could not settle.

I rang the bell and the night nurse gave me some morphine which helped a little and I waited an hour and was almost in tears by this stage. She hooked up a paracetamol drip and I finally got some sleep, about 3 hours worth!

The day started early as they do with hospitals.  All three of us started the same routine, breakfast, and the bed baths. The amazing red disinfectant was removed and the bandage checked. The sexy TEDS (dark green stockings for stopping my legs swelling and halt blood clots forming) were applied with a bit of wrestling.  Then the physiotherapy team came in and there was in bed exercises and then there was Zimmer frames! Walking! You read that right. Up walking in about 16 hours of surgery. Not that painful as there was still local anaesthetic rattling the joint.  Although very awkward with the catheter.

The oddest bit for me is it felt all cock-eyed when I stood up. Mr Hutt had almost made me completely level. A very surreal and distinctly odd feeling. It has taken my brain a little time to catch up.
There was more physio after lunch, walking with a Zimmer frame and generally a bit of exercising and drinking all water because if you filled it enough you could get it out.

I was taken to x-ray which proved to be a difficult, I felt very much pushed around and put into an EXTREMELY uncomfortable position that upset me a bit. But I did get to see the x-ray and it looks amazing. A nurse came in and told me that Mr Hutt was pleased with the x-ray.

By Friday dinner time I was pretty over the catheter, uncomfortable and annoying and I was drinking heaps and filling it up. The Physio was happy I could walk myself to the toilet. I asked the nurse if I could get it out and she said I had to wait till morning. I was a little disappointed with that and willing to wait morning but it was driving me bonkers. The head nurse then decided to do it then and there because she felt that I would be okay. Not the most comfortable experience but very thankful for the nurse to get it out quickly and understand that I was over it.

My visitors went and I collapsed for the night it had been a long couple of days.

Health check!

So, finally, I got my health check. One of the most intensive health assessments I have ever done.

There was five hours of public transport travel, four different questionnaires, three vials of blood, two different nurses and one X-ray and pee sample.  And that was just the highlights.

Mr Gin and I travelled across London to the Epsom General Hospital and the Elective orthopaedic Centre.  We were there for two hours but there really was not much waiting around. The waiting room was filled with older people but the nursing staff seemed used to younger patients. (I know I am 41 but in this procedure I am quite young)
There was a quick height and weight check along with a charming stick up the nose moment.
Then a different nurse took some of the most comprehensive health questions I have ever had. We worked out that I have had 15 General anaesthetics, a fairly high amount. It was nice to meet a medical practitioner that knew the proper names for the procedures I have done!

Also there was a "Wow!" when the x-ray below was produced! Apparently I do good work.  For comparison I have included the x-ray from nine years ago. Sorry for the poor quality.

2009

2015

At the end of the health exam, with all the bells and whistles including checking that all my blood goes to all the right places, she answered a number of concerns as we had.  It was drummed into me not to be sick and I am taking lots precautions to avoid colds, scratches and anything that could halt the procedure.

Then there was blood given and x-ray taken. Then we headed home.

All together painless and now the serious count down begins.

Our hero battles a panther, Hutt and official old lady status.

Panther.

My morning began with a dropped Naproxen pill and trying to convince our forever hungry black cat that the white pill was not a treat and not fall over picking the damn thing up!

Hutt.

The main job today was to get to St George hospital in Tooting, an hour and half journey of bus, tube, tube and a bit of a walk.
Finding the department was a challenge because I had no letter due to the short notice. I knew who it was to be with and after directions from a helpful volunteer I found my way to the orthopaedic and trauma department. Filled with young people with busted limbs, older people with sticks and a lot of sets of crutches, it was a busy place and I registered my presence via the electronic do hickey instead of queuing and settled in for a long wait.  Ten minutes and my name was called!  Win!
The lovely nurse informed me I had to take myself off to x-ray. I had already sent one in but they wanted more. I walked past the same volunteer and presented my slip to the lady. At that point I was told there would be a two hour wait!  I may not of worn my yoga pants that are helpful for x-rays but I did bring a book. I checked in with Mr Gin, having to leave as there was no signal and then came back in and settled down to read the book.  This was a much better plan that shopping like my first though as I got into four pages in and my name was called. I was about to introduce crunchy the hip to a trainee radiographer and have to wear a hospital gown! Joy!
The x-ray was quite uncomfortable, really odd pose in one of the shots. The radiographer did have a fun time finding bits of pelvis, as they feel peculiar due to bone graft donor sites.
Back to the delightfully named Orthopaedics and Trauma clinic. Again ready for a wait. Again, not much of one.
The person who called me was not Phillip Mitchell, he introduced himself as Mr Hutt. No a good start. It turns out Mr Hutt has a special interest in younger hip issue patients with a focus on people like myself with complications of childhood surgery.  He seemed very interested and was surprised that I had early x-rays with me.We did a history. Then moved to why I made sure I wore sensible underwear. He called for a hospital gown, I know from experience that this is a fiddly way to do these exams. Clear view of the legs and pelvis helps the doctor and I have done it so much of this, I am not fussed about gowns. So, I walked the hobbly walk. Scored my hyper-mobility, 8/9. Then the pulling, twisting and bending and making me go ouch. He also checked the scar on the side of my thigh, he said they could excise the scar and extend it.
Trousers on and a long talk about the complications that could occur. One of the more worrying ones is a possibility of doing damage to my sciatic nerve.  Apparently with the amount of surgery I have had there is a possibility the nerve is not in the normal location and could be close to the surgery site, and permanent damage done. A surprising thing is my right leg could end up longer than my left!
The short outcome is the hip is full of arthritis and there is no joint space left in the hip, it is worn out. I could either leave it and carry on or get a hip replacement.

And this is the metal:  https://www.depuysynthes.com/hcp/hip/products/qs/S-ROM-Modular-Hip-System

I have said yes to this, it is needful, I am not going to be able to live like this much longer, I want my life back.  It will take 6 to 12 months to recover. Younger hip replacement recipients struggle with recovery because of the lack of feedback through the joint. I am not sure I have had much feedback besides pain!  So, 2016 is the year of the new hip. No marathons but still good.

And it will be done by Jonathan Hutt, because as a younger surgeon, he will be around to do the left and right revision.  Also, he was not offended when I was very hesitant about him and said I could swap surgeons if I wanted. I also had a good vibe from him, he is my age and understands why I'm all about wanting my life back. And with some luck, I won't call him Jabba.

Old Lady Status.

I now own slip on Sketcher shoes, Old lady shoes but ones I can put on myself!

Thank you Mr Gin for helping me through today.

Underwear

This morning I spent a bit of time choosing my outfit, making sure I wore underwear that I would not flash the world in as well as a complete lack  of zips and button on my trousers. So, wearing my yoga pants I headed off to Whipps Cross hospital to get my x-ray done!
The appointment was for 9.05pm and I limped down the very long hallway that is the spine of this Victorian rabbit warren.  It was fairly standard, although I was surprised that it was a standing x-ray.  The radiologist was impressed by my trouser choice. I had to stand pigeon toed which is not comfortable at all.  But it really was in and out!  Astoundingly quick.
I did get a copy of the x-ray but annoyingly am unable to open the image. I am going to contact the hospital about this.
Now to wait for the consultant appointment.